Retro iPod alarm clock

Over at Firebox.com you can find this really interesting alarm clock that is supposed to remind you of those old twin-belled alarm clocks. The cool thing with this one is that you can dock your iPod into it and hear your favourite songs as wake-up calls. Cool - a bit expensive though ($78).

Teddy USB memory

This teddy bear is nearly as cool as the Barbie topping my The top 10 weirdest USB drives ever. This teddy bear is also homemade and has a standard USB drive inside the body. I bet you have to be careful with this one to not scare the kids, hehe.

Pocket Plasma

Pocket Plasma, it's a funky club light system you can wear on your belt. Hyper-reactive to sound, this brilliant little gizmo pulses with a weird and wonderful web of multi-coloured lightning bolts that radiate from its core. You can either set it to 'On', where it will dazzle with a random network of bright neon colour light, or set it to 'Sound' where it will react to the slightest sound and movement sending out its coloured lightning bolts in time to music or flashing as you speak. The louder the sound the brighter the tendrils of light - it's really quite mesmerising.

Features
Mesmerising Pocket Plasma light system.
It's attachable practically anywhere you want thanks to the built-in clip on the back.
'On/Off/Sound' switch helps you to control your gizmo.
Lightweight design.
Requires 2 x AAA batteries (not included).
Suitable for ages 12 years+.
Size: 7 x 7 x 3.5 cm.
Pocket plasma has got two reacting modes:
'On' mode gives you a random network of bright lights.
When the Pocket Plasma to 'Sound' mode it responds to touch, voice and music.

The Pocket Plasma is an electric device so should be stored in a dry place, avoiding extremely hot and arctic conditions.

the Racing Grannies

Possibly the best wind-up toy ever invented, the Racing Grannies are to geriatric speedway what Ferrari is to Formula One. As anyone who has been on the receiving end of a Zimmer-frame will know, grannies are formidable movers with legendary stamina, and these delightful wind-ups are testament to their endurance. With expressions of steely determination and complete with go-faster cardigans, these two are just a few winds away from the race of their lives. It's time to have your own Gran National!

Features
Set of 2 wind-up grannies.
Clashing outfits, silver hair, droopy breasts and a snazzy zimmerframe.
Adjustable arms so the Grannies can be in 'Stand-up' mode or bent to 'Race' mode.
Made of plastic.
Presented in an illustrated box with witty captions.
Suitable for ages 8 years+.
Size: - Individual Granny: 8 x 6 x 4cm
Presentation Box: 15.5 x 11.5 x 7cm.
Whilst this product is technically suitable for those of 8 years and up, after extensive research (well, the office) we have discovered that the older you are the more hilarious you find this product.

The Gorilla Pod

At last some bright spark has invented a compact, tough and flexible travel camera tripod that actually works. The Gorilla Pod, that comes in both compact and SLR sizes, is an ingenious and versatile tripod that'll support your camera pretty well anywhere.
With three super flexible and yet sturdy bendable legs, it will cling to branches, tables, rocks, and create a stable platform on any surface however rough and uneven. The top of the tripod has a super-slim slip plate that you can keep fixed onto the bottom of your camera or video, and then just click into place whenever you need. The flexible joints in the legs can rotate through 360 degrees to form the perfect shape on any terrain.
Our photographer has worked all over the world on travel assignments (jammy so and so), and he's blown away by the compactness, strength and versatility of the Gorilla Pod, and reckons it's the best travel tripod he's ever seen. Whether you need the mini one for a small digital camera, or the large version for your SLR or Video, this tripod can take the strain, and knocks the socks off any other travel tripod on the market.

Features
A compact, tough and flexible travel camera tripod.
Available in compact and SLR sizes.
A slimline screw attachment so your camera stays connected on even the most uneven surfaces.
Three super flexible yet sturdy legs.
The legs have flexible joints that rotate 360°.
The legs have ring and foot grips to provide extra grip so your pods can cling to branches, tables and rocks.
Suitable for ages 16 years+.
Size:
Compact Pod:12cm leg length
SLR Pod: 19cm leg length.

Lifetimer

Time is so staggeringly elastic. The seconds of terrifying anticipation before your parachute opens stretch ahead of you like hours, the minutes before you have to get out of your warm bed to go to work flash by in a nanosecond. The Lifetimer clock lets you keep track of the important things in life in a wonderfully novel way. The clock face is surrounded by a collection of buttons relating to different aspects of your life, such as your next holiday, your next tea break, your birthday, the time you knock off from work, even the last time you had rumpy pumpy. Simply pressing any of these buttons will give you the number of hours, minutes and seconds you've got left (or that have passed in the case of some) till the event happens. Press, and it's only seven minutes and twenty seconds to your coffee break; press, and you've been in your current relationship for two years, three months, six days, ten hours, four minutes and twelve seconds, etc etc. It's a brilliant idea and great fun - in fact it's amazing quite how much time you can waste simply pressing the buttons to see how much time you're wasting. Watch the seconds left till you can go home from work tick away (backwards of course), or the days since you last made like a rabbit add depressingly up.
The Lifetimer - possibly the most interesting and interactive clock ever invented.

Features
The Lifetimer keeps track of the important things in life, counting up or down to momentous events like 'home time'.
An option to set the clock to 12 or 24 hour clock.
A stopwatch function.
The Lifetimer counts the days until your Birthday, Christmas, next holiday, lunch hour, home time, the weekend, the event of your choice.
The Lifetimer times how long it has been since you started your job, began your relationship, last had sex.
The calendar stretches up to the year 2050.
The Lifetimer is an interactive little thing, pinging away with date reminders and scrolling messages across its back-lit LCD screen.
Ergonomically designed.
Powered with 2 x AAA batteries (included).
Suitable for ages 12 years+.
Size: 8.5 x 9.4 x 8.5 cm.

Orgasmatron Head Massagers

The Orgasmatron sounds like a cross between a film prop from Barbarella and Woody Allen's Sleeper, and well it kind of is. These arachnid looking contraptions will have you tingling all over in a matter of seconds. Using the high conductivity of copper, the Orgasmatron's long and bendy arms pinpoint sensitive pressure areas in the scalp, and however hard you are, once someone gently applies this to your head you'll turn to jelly.
There are two versions available, the Original manual version, and the new Trembler version which is battery powered and has a two-speed vibrate capability for more full-on head massages. We don't really know the full scientific answer as to why they seem to render all victims helpless and crying out for more. It's about pressure points, copper, wobbly wire, nerve clusters and all sorts of other stuff we expect, but none of that really matters. All we care about is when is it our turn to have another massage!

Features
-The Original and The Trembler Orgazmatrons are both designed to gently massage the pressure points located on the head and the back of the neck.
-The Orgazmatrons' copper prongs can be spread out for massaging or pushed back to flat. The Original:
-Copper claw shaped head massager.
-Comes in a sexy red velvet pouch.

Size (when flat): 25.5 x 13 x 1.5cm. The Trembler:
-2 speed switch for soft/intense head massaging.
-Copper ripped claws that act as a conductor, tapping into your body's electrical fields.
-Requires 2 x AA Batteries (included).
-Size: 25 x 14 x 8cm.